a perfect little tree

dear love,

just yesterday i was telling my dear friend brittany that i never blog anymore because nothing funny/weird/interesting has happened to me lately (which, as you know, are the things i normally blog about). life has been soooooo good, don't get me wrong, i just haven't felt like i have much to say that would be interesting. well, how untrue that was!

i got home from taking a final, working, and going to the gym to a husband who had cleaned the ENTIRE apartment. we're talking nooks and crannies, bathroom, sheets washed, the whole shebang. then he told me he had a surprise for me later. so, he opened our chest at the foot of the bed and pulled out these supplies and told me we were going to make our own christmas tree. here's how it turned out.

it was sooo fun! the tree might look a little sad to you, and maybe even a little crooked but i think it's perfect. the pine cones smell like cinnamon and our little apartment is now officially Christmas-y.

i'm thankful for

i love reflecting on all the things i'm grateful for--especially this time of year. i am now going to attempt to enumerate these things mostly for my benefit, but feel free to read on.

• my husband! i don't know anyone better. look at this face!
• the gospel: truth, temples, worship, happiness, progression
• family: mom, dad, step mom, jordie, ted, charis, rich, ami, katie, kelly. and then there's my new family who i am so grateful for too: millard, jo, tiffany and her fam, matney and her fam, tyler, and emry. love you all! and then there's my list of millions of amazing aunts, uncles, cousins who i love so much!
• friends: there are some friends who have really been instrumental in my life. let's start from the beginning. amy, alex, shweta, nina, kristen, danielle, kalisha, brittany, dana, lindsey, alyssa, sheila, cari, carolyn, katherine, danielle, elizabeth, karlee, chantal...on and on. thank you all for being such amazing influences in my life.
• music: new fav of the month = the weepies
• computers
• school: even though i complain about you oh-so-much, i still really do love you.
• good food
• work: it's great to have a job where i feel like i'm helping people! and i even have my own little space heater by my computer which is yet another thing i'm grateful for.
• good knives
• moments where you love sooo much that it kind of hurts
• thanksgiving! best holiday ever.
• getting money from the government to go to school. CASHMONEY
• sleeping in
• mountains: snow in the winter, hiking in the summer!
• rocks: i'm grateful for these because billie likes these.

wash your hands

dear love,

please, please, please wash your hands. especially if you are at someone's house, for example, making sushi. if you neglect this important detail, something nasty might happen like infecting multiple people with salmonella. just a thought.

if you're wondering why i bring this up, let's just say i have some experience with this type of food borne illness. it's a nasty one. somehow i feel it's my duty as a member of society to tell the world to wash your hands. i know it's hard sometimes--but do it! the rest of us will thank you.

happy eating! :)

a few things

dear love,

just a few things that made me happy today:

• getting a 95% on my interior design test that i barely studied for and felt like i was guessing the entire time. i must be destined to be the most amazing home-maker ever.
• crossing off 7/20 of my school things i need to finish before the wedding.
• speaking of wedding, we're down to 11 days on the countdown, people!
• i realized that it's candy corn season again. heck to the yes.
• being in awesome groups for school things. group projects can be awful, but i have the best classmates in the entire world.

that is all.

awesome people

dear love,

i know it's been a while. but, as promised, i am giving you something worth waiting for...my latest stalker pictures. enjoy!

this girl knows where it's at. can someone plleeeeeease tell me where she found that thing? my birthday is in three weeks...

this is an old one i took over the summer. please notice the amazing choice of shorts overalls with sperry's. can you even???

this is hot off the press! i saw this out my window as i was waiting at a stop light today and i definitely took this right before the light turned green. shhh don't tell, but wow. amazing!

the mullet never gets old

dear love,

today i saw something amazing. i saw a little pre-teen boy with a legit mullet. and wranglers (they were TIGHT!!) and a wife beater. and a mullet. needless to say, when we saw this little guy we knew i had to try to get a picture with my phone because it's a widely known fact that i take amazing stalking creeper pics of weirdos. sorry to say i didn't get to take one because right as we caught up to him, he did an about face and headed the other direction. it would have looked really crazy if we did the same thing and followed him so the moment was lost. we didn't get that picture. but please just picture it in your mind and smile.

it may or may not have looked a little like this

nut-el-ahhhh

dear love,

i have been trying to come up with some fancy and exciting way of saying this but i've decided just to say it simply--i'm in love. yes, i love my fiance but i'm actually talking about something else. here it goes...

I LOVE NUTELLA

i can't even help it. i love everything about it. i love the way it's always the perfect melty consistency. i love it on toast, on pancakes, on ice cream, and even just by its little self on a spoon.

i've done a little research. the sources vary somewhat, but they all agree that nutella was originally created during times where cocoa beans were either unavailable or too expensive. pastry makers wanted a way to keep the chocolatey flavor going without the expense of chocolate. so they found hazelnuts! what a miracle!

sometimes i have to force myself not to buy it because it can disappear way too quickly. other times i'm so good about eating just a spoonful everyday. i had my spoonful today and it was a great day! you should try it.

plant girl

dear love,

i like plants. i love the way they look inside or outside, tall or big, flowers or no flowers. plants just bring life to a place. one time i even planted a tree in thailand.

because of my love for plants, i am officially the "plant girl" at work. i fill up our little pitcher and walk around the office watering the plants. it takes me about 5 pitchers full before i finish. we have a wide range of plant life in the office. keeps us healthy. keeps us happy.

on to a more important note: i was walking to work this morning and i realized something major. i saw the landscape crew right by the SWKT working their little buns off. these guys (and girls!) are for reals. they wear their grunge jeans and their i-dont-care-what-i-look-like shirts and they just work hard all day. i always see them on campus and think nothing of it. today was different though. i realized today how much i secretly want to be one of those people. i want to wear gloves and break my back bending over and use a shovel once in a while.

ok seriously

dear love,

i was walking home from work the other day and i realized i REALLY had to go pee. like, there was not going to be a way to make it home. so i stopped in the JSB on my way back and ran to the bathroom. on my way, i saw this:

i did a double take and didn't give it the attention it deserved because i had to pee so bad. but when i got out of the bathroom i snapped the pic and i just want to say a few things about to this girl, whoever she may be.

first i would say, "hi. how are you? are things going okay in your life?" then after a little small talk i would dig deeper, you know, get to the core of who she is. "so when you were studying that day, what exactly was going through your mind? did you just get new undies and you wanted to show them off to the world? or maybe you thought boys would totally dig the posish (pronounced 'puh-zish', emphasis on the 'zish') you were laying down in? or maybe it was just comfy and you had no idea how suggestive it looked." after we became best friends, i would kindly tell her that she should probably not do that anymore. the end.

another confession

dear love,

i used to be a little obsessed with watching oprah...there, i said it! i don't really know why and how the obsession started, but it began some time during high school. when my parents got tivo, i would come home from practice and chill on the couch and check out what oprah had going on for the day. i have to admit, i think she helped me become a better person. here are some things i've learned from oprah winfrey: (let me just say that i'm kinda joking and kinda not here)

• there are lots of sexual predators. don't trust just anyone with your children.
• people look a lot better on her show than when the cameras surprise them at their houses. makeovers? mmhmm.
• she did shows about eating disorders and all kinds of other issues specific to the teenage years. i was really scared from the pictures and interviews with anorexic and bulimic people.
• i think i kinda learned to love myself more. appreciate who i am. (i don't know?!)

anyway, the list goes on. my point is, i went through a little time period where oprah was a dear friend of mine. we hung out after school and sometimes even on weekend nights (nerd!). my freshman year of college, i actually kind of attempted to schedule my classes to not be a 4:00 so that i could chill a little by the tv and see what oprah had to say that day. the past few years i have grown less and less attached. it's all apart of a healthy evolving relationship.

today, however, i find myself at work during the time that oprah is on. i'm finding myself wanting to be home so that i can watch oprah...out of nowhere! what the?

guess what?

dear LOVE,

so i haven't written on my blog in for-e-ver (said like the classic sandlot boys) because i've only had one thing on my mind lately and it's been a little bit of a secret. but now it's not a secret anymore and i'm going to shout it on the roof tops, i tell ya!

I AM GOING TO BE MRS. PAIGE SMATHERS. that's right, i'm engaged! it happened officially last tuesday night and it was perfect. he proposed where we met last august on one knee and everything. the sun was setting behind mount nebo and the rest of the scenery was this beautiful shade of deep green from all the rain we've been getting. he said this cute little speech and we both just soaked the moment in. it was perfect!

spelunking

dear love,

a few days ago, i went spelunking. that's right, spelunking. it was such a thrill and super scary but i was a little bit proud of myself that i did it!

spe·lunk·er (sp -l ng k r, sp l ng -). n. One who explores caves chiefly as a hobby; a caver. i.e. paige henry.

this wasn't some cave you pay money to go in and walk around with pretty lights and see the cool things caves had to offer. oh no, this cave was in the side of a mountain where it was obvious only a few people had ever really seen before. the cave was suuuuper narrow. we had to squeeze through a couple of extremely tight spots. we're talking one more pound on me and i wouldn't have made it through. for a while all we could do was have our buns on one wall and our feet on the other and just shimmy our way completely vertical for about 25 feet. and then we finally reached a place where you couldn't go any further and we knew we had conquered the cave!

happy future mother's day!

your heart

dear love,

sometimes you give someone a piece of your heart on a pretty silver platter. it's the scariest thing because that person could do anything they want with something that is so intimately yours and yours only. you hand it over apprehensively, with one hand halfway covering your eyes so you can still see a little out of the cracks your fingers make. you sit and wait once it's handed over, you search the person's face for any indication of what is going to happen to that part of you that you just offered them. will it be squashed or used or cheated on or taken advantage of? or will it be listened to, loved, nurtured, and comforted?

sometimes people exceed your expectations. sometimes they take the piece of your heart you gave them and wrap their arms around you and tell you that everything is going to be okay.

grades

dear love,

please let me just vent about something. don't judge me and think i'm crazy...just go with it.

i took my very last religion class ever this last semester. i liked it and everything but i guess i didn't really study enough or take it seriously enough (what's new?) i knew my grade was pretty borderline B+ A- but i figured it should be just fine. when i checked my grades i got a B+ in the class and checked the percentage on blackboard. okay SERIOUSLY my grade calculated out to be an 89.85%. i didn't worry too much because i figured i would just talk to the teacher and he would see that was silly and that i should get an A-. i emailed both the ta and the teacher and just barely got a response back from the ta which read: "please see the syllabus for grade cut offs" and THAT WAS ALL HE SAID. if i wasn't mad before i was now. c'mon BYU religion classes, get a freakin grip on reality. i went to class every single day except one, did the readings and the journals every single time, participated regularly, and if i had gotten one more point out of like 750 my grade would be over 90%. stupid and dumb.

okay i feel better now.

musical moment

dear love,

ok so here's the thing. i hardly ever really play my guitar for big groups of people, in fact, tonight was only the second time i've ever done it. that's right, the BYU 236th ward had a talent show tonight and i sang a little song and it was fun.

picking the song was difficult, but after input from kath, my sister, and a few others, i chose this one. india arie is my favorite artist in the entire world. i've seen her in concert three times and im slightly obsessed. so i went with one of her songs and it all turned out okay in the end.

i want to give a few shout outs to some amazing performances.

• carolyn on the guitar—free fallin has never sounded better. perhaps a private concert to lull me to sleep in the near future?
• ariel—okay seriously?? the words you sang were B E A U T I F U L and wow, you can siiiing!
• shane—boy's got MOVES.
• taj—love the videos. especially the mustache one. (see video below).
• kath—i know you technically didn't perform, but your comments were classic throughout the show, and it wouldn't have been the same without you.

so yay for me being brave! oh and thank you to the august rush man who made a surprise guest appearance at our very own ward talent show. you rocked!

FEMULLET

dear love,

it was a normal thursday afternoon. i had just gotten out of my clinical class and i was on my way outside for my biweekly 30 minute people watching session. the next thing i knew, i was staring at one of the most amazing sights i have ever seen. this fe-mullet.

at first i panicked because i knew i didn't have my camera with me. but then i remembered that my phone has a camera on it, so the next thing i knew i was on my way, phone in hand, ready for some serious stalking. i decided it was too weird to hold my phone up so that she could see me taking the picture, so i took a risk and held the phone at my leg and took the creeper shot that way, hoping i would have her in the frame. i looked at the picture, overjoyed with the results. not only did i get the full body shot, BUT the wind picked up right at the moment i snapped it. e-p-i-c.

i laughed literally for a half hour straight. by myself. i had to pretend i was on the phone so that people wouldn't stare.

some lingering questions:

• who cuts hair such as this?
• how do i become that awesome?
• how is not an "extreme hairstyle" that would usually be banned from BYU campus?
• when she wakes up in the morning, does she really think, "yep!! i'm looking good!" ???
• how do i become her friend?

i've decided to frame this picture and put it up on my wall next to the other photo i have. (the really crazy man and wife(?) that hangs proudly in our living room). because my lovely roommates always tell people that those crazy-looking people are my parents, a friend suggested that i tell people that this mullet woman is my twin sister who plays softball.

this one's for you, cort. "WHAT A PLAY!!!"

a realization resolution

dear love,

it's been a really long time since i last wrote on my blog. here goes my best attempt.

something that's been on my mind lately is understanding why i have such a hard time trying new things. examples: my first time i tried playing golf, i was in tears by the end of the second hole. i kept swinging and missing and was sooooo frustrated. i was scared to even try and then when i wasn't good, i just wanted to give up. i guess i just want to be good at everything i do. another example is my dance class. i am absolutely terrified of the entire scene—it's completely uncomfortable. first of all, you have to ask people to dance and hold sweaty guys' hands, and you have to deal with the people who have been dancing their entire lives and are waaaay better than you and intimidating. these two examples are things that i have actually tried to do after much self-convincing, but it makes me REALLY uncomfortable.

so here's the catch. i've realized that if i could boil it all down to one thing it would be fear. i'm flat-out scared to try new things. i'm scared i will look dumb, not be able to do it, or just fail altogether. this realization was a surprising one for me because i don't see myself as really being scared of stuff like that. but i think that there's definitely an element of fear related to the things i never actually try.

i'm going to fix this. i'm telling myself that i am going to try new things and recognize that i might be scared but i'm going to do it anyway. i heard this great quote once: "if you want things to happen that have never happened before you have to do things you've never done before." i'm going to do things i've never done before and i'm not going to let fear get in my way. and i'm going to be awesome. done and done.

love love love.

dear love,

all you need is love. that's what they say.

my little talents

dear love,

you know how the first day of the semester teachers will ask the class to go around and say their name, where they're from, and something interesting about them? well, it's caused me to really dig deep, in heartfelt contemplation about what is interesting about ME?

here are some answers i've come up with:

first, i can make a really cool face. it looks a little something like this

second, i am probably the best at knowing which size tupperware to use for leftovers. this was

especially obvious when i was home for the holidays. my family used this skill of mine many times after the mounds of food we would eat.

and last but not least, i have another talent. it's something i used to brag about a lot back in the day, but i've had fewer and fewer chances to show this one off due to cell phones. ladies and gentlemen, i am here to announce that i am REALLY good at memorizing phone numbers. this used to be a huge inside joke with me and my high school boyfriend so if he were to ever read this, he would chuckle.

that is all. what are your secret little talents?